There’s a moment most parents recognise.
Your child wants to join a game. They hover. They wait. They finally say, “Can I play?”
Sometimes it works beautifully. Sometimes it doesn’t. And sometimes they walk back to you in tears. It’s hard to watch. But here’s something reassuring: Those moments are where resilience begins.
For children aged 2-5, resilience isn’t built in big life events. It’s built in everyday social experiences - in sandpits, block corners and dress-ups.
It grows when children:
- wait for a turn
- cope with being told “not right now”
- work through disagreements
- try again after things don’t go to plan
That’s social development. And it’s one of the most important foundations for school and life.
What resilience really looks like at this age
Resilience in early childhood doesn’t mean being tough or never getting upset.
It looks like:
- crying... and then going back to play
- getting frustrated... but staying connected
- asking for help
- trying again tomorrow
The Harvard Center on the Developing Child explains that supportive relationships are one of the strongest protective factors in building resilience. Children develop coping skills through consistent, responsive interactions, first with adults, and then increasingly with peers.
In other words, resilience grows in relationships. And friendships give children daily opportunities to practice.
Why friendships matter more than we think
Between ages 2-5, children are learning how to:
- share space
- take turns
- read facial expressions
- negotiate
- repair after conflict
The Raising Children Network highlights that making and keeping friends helps preschoolers build cooperation, empathy and problem-solving skills.
These are not “nice extras.”
They’re the same skills children rely on when they start school - working in groups, coping with change, managing big feelings and bouncing back from small setbacks.
Learning to be with others is a life skill.
If your child finds friendships hard
If you’re thinking:
- “My child gets upset very easily.”
- “He struggles to share.”
- “She prefers to play alone.”
- “He melts down when things don’t go his way.”
That doesn’t mean something is wrong.
Social skills are learned. And like any skill, they take practice. Some children are naturally outgoing. Others are cautious observers. Both are normal.
What matters most is that children have safe, supported opportunities to practice social interactions, not that they get it perfect.
The hidden resilience lessons inside everyday play
Those tricky social moments? They’re doing important work.
- When a child has to wait for a turn, they’re building impulse control.
- When they argue over a toy, they’re learning negotiation and boundaries.
- When they feel left out, they’re learning how to cope with disappointment.
- When they say sorry and return to play, they’re learning that relationships can recover.
That’s resilience in early childhood. Messy, emotional, but incredibly valuable.
How Milestones supports social skills and resilience
At Milestones, social development isn’t an afterthought. It’s intentionally supported through our Lifelong Learning Curriculum.
Educators gently guide children to:
- Use friendship language (“Can I join?” “How can we fix this?”)
- Recognise and name feelings
- Solve problems together
- Practise turn-taking in structured and unstructured play
- Rebuild connection after conflict
We don’t expect children to manage social challenges alone. We stay close, coach calmly and help them build the skills gradually.
Because when children feel emotionally safe, they’re more willing to take social risks, and that’s how confidence grows.
Simple ways to support social development at home
You don’t need to orchestrate perfect playdates. Small, everyday support helps most.
Give them the words.
Children often struggle socially because they don’t know what to say. Try practising phrases like:
- “Can I have a turn next?”
- “I didn’t like that.”
- “Do you want to play?”
Keep playdates short.
Forty-five to ninety minutes is often plenty at this age.
Name effort, not just behaviour.
“You waited, even though that was hard.”
“You kept trying to join the game.”
Let disappointment happen.
Instead of fixing everything straight away, try:
“That hurt.”
Then: “What could we try next?”
That’s how coping skills strengthen.
Why this matters for school readiness
When children move into preschool or kindergarten, success isn’t just about early literacy or counting.
It’s about being able to:
- work in a group
- handle changes in routine
- ask for help
- manage frustration
- recover from small setbacks
Those abilities grow directly from early social experiences.
Friendships are not just sweet childhood memories. They’re training grounds for resilience.
The takeaway
Resilience in early childhood is built:
- In playground negotiations.
- In block tower disagreements.
- In brave “Can I play?” moments.
Every time your child navigates a social wobble and tries again, they’re building skills they’ll use for the rest of their life.
And when they’re supported - at home and in a nurturing early learning environment - those small moments become powerful foundations.
If you’d like to see how your child could be supported socially and emotionally at Milestones, you can find your nearest centre and book a tour here.